.comment-link {margin-left:.6em;}

4/04/2006

Moussaoui Not Eligible for Death Penalty; Gets Double Minors, Game Misconduct

Left: Defenseman Moussaoui lost for key game

(Alexandria, VA) A jury found today that Zacarias Moussaoui, the only person to be prosecuted in connection with the terrorist attacks of September 11 2001, was not eligible for the death penalty.

Instead, the would-be hijacker faces double minor penalties for hooking and slashing, and will be lost to his team for the next four minutes.

In addition, Moussaoui received a game misconduct on the disputed call. His teammates on the New Jersey Devils were disappointed in the decision.

"He's come out and put his heart on the line every single game he plays," said goalie Martin Brodeur. "It's a tough blow for the team to see Moussaoui out for even one game. He just terrorizes opposing forwards."

Another teammate lauded Moussaoui's defensive skills.

"No one takes his man out at the blue line like Zac," said center Patrik Elias. "He has explosive power and can fly right at you."

Moussaoui defied skeptics who said he was only a minor player in the Al Qaeda Hockey League, developing into a premier defenseman before being picked up by the NHL's Devils.

Brodeur remained convincd that the misconduct call was a "farce."

"Look - the guy never even blew up at the ref," he said. "They have hung men for less than what Zac did." Mary Winkler

Comments: Post a Comment



<< Home
Copyright 2007, National Nitwit ® . Unauthorized duplication prohibited, but feel free to link away. This is a satirical newspaper, and many of these stories are fictional. You have to guess which ones are faked. National Nitwit ® uses invented names in its stories, except when public figures are being satirized, or when we post a real story. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental. Subcomandante Bob once got jiggy with your mom, and she does things in bed that would shock you, dude. The content of this website is the property of National Nitwit ® and its authors, and may not be reprinted or retransmitted in whole or in part without the expressed written consent of the publisher. National Nitwit® is not designed for readers under 18 years of age. FAIR USE NOTICE: This site contains copyrighted material the use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. We are making such material available in our efforts to advance understanding of environmental, political, human rights, economic, democracy, scientific, and social justice issues, sustainable development, environmental, community and worker health, democracy, public disclosure, corporate accountability, and social justice issues, mostly because hot college women are also interested in the same issues. Go figure. Anyways, we believe this constitutes a "fair use" of any such copyrighted material as provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107, the material on this site is distributed without fee or payment of any kind to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving the included information for research and educational purposes, except when you are using it to get laid. If you wish to use copyrighted material from this site for purposes of your own that go beyond 'fair use', you must obtain permission from the copyright owner.

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?