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10/07/2005

Oprah Helps Nail Sex Offender


(Fargo, ND) Television host Oprah Winfrey assisted law enforcement officers with the capture of a wanted sex offender.

William Davis, 33, of Wadesville, IN, was arrested in Fargo on Thursday, two days after the talk-show host broadcast his face and offered $100,000 for information leading to his arrest.

Winfrey also assisted in the takedown of the suspect, tackling the runaway convict and smashing his face in the dirt.

"You like that, motherfucker?" screamed Winfrey. "What do you say we just beat the ever-loving shit out of this asshole now, boys?"


Startled state highway patrolmen looked on as Winfrey pulled out a billy club and struck the handcuffed Davis a dozen times on the head, groin, and ribs.

"You like to play rough, huh, faggot!" she screamed, spitting on the cowering Davis. "You're lucky I left my .45 at home, bitch!"

A spokesman for Winfrey said that the talk show host "got a little carried away, but she has no regrets" for breaking 8 of Davis's ribs.

# posted by Subcomandante Bob : 3:33 PM
Comments:
Look -

I only did what all y'all would have done if you were there.

And no, I did not tazer his testicles. That is a damned lie.

Thank you.
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 5:55 PM
 
Oprah kicks ass.
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 7:29 AM
 
Oprah Wanted him, bad...

“Steadman the dead man,” as she refers to her long-time squeeze, doesn't get it for me any more.

Apparently she's now into ”Ruff Sex” (rough sex, pronounced with unabashed zeal), hence the mischaracterized attack.

It was foreplay…
# posted by Blogger Hooda Thunkit (Dave Zawodny) : 8:46 AM
 
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