.comment-link {margin-left:.6em;}


NRA Defends Cheney's Right To Shoot Whoever The Fuck He Wants

(Washington, DC) National Rifle Association President Sandra Froman spoke to National Nitwit today about the recent Texas shooting incident involving Vice President Dick Cheney.

"The Second Amendment is quite clear - Mr. Cheney can shoot whoever the fuck he wants," said Froman. "It's both a God-given and Constitutionally-protected right."

Mr. Cheney accidentally shot a prominent Austin lawyer named Harry Whittington while the two men were on a quail hunting expedition in South Texas on Saturday, firing shotgun pellets at the man while trying to aim for a bird.

Froman believes that Cheney should have used a more powerful weapon.

"If he had been carrying the M16A2 5.56mm semiautomatic rifle, Whittington would have been dropped on the spot," she said. "Instead, this lawyer lives to file another frivolous lawsuit against an American corporation."

White House officials, who did not make public the shooting incident for 24 hours, did not say how Mr. Whittington and Mr. Cheney were acquainted. Froman said that she hoped Cheney would follow up.

"There's nothing worse than allowing game to escape while merely wounded," she said. "Mr. Cheney should follow the trail and finish the poor bastard off."

Whoa - too funny!

It was an ACCIDENT, all right? Coulda happened to any of us, but it turned out to be me.

If the fucker hadn't been traipsing around off the trail (funny story - Harry had to take a leak) this never would have happened.

Anyways, he had it coming for that Depends underwear joke he told at my birthday roast last year. Bastard.
BTW - where did you find that pic? Can you say "irony"?

I'm glad to see the NRA is all over this thing...

In some respects, the entire incident strikes me as too posed and too timely. I wonder if this isn't some sort of "wag the dog" trick to get us to look away from something else...
One of my blog's commentors says he now knows why Bush spends so much time clearing brush at his ranch.

What a novel interpretation...the conspiracy theorist in us thinks you may be onto something.
(laughs at Stephen's witticism)

What is the daily bag limlt on lawyers in Texas?

And, do you need a lawyer stamp on your license to take one?

I'm thinking Cheney didn't have the license to bag a lawyer, so he had to let Harry go.
Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home
Copyright 2007, National Nitwit ® . Unauthorized duplication prohibited, but feel free to link away. This is a satirical newspaper, and many of these stories are fictional. You have to guess which ones are faked. National Nitwit ® uses invented names in its stories, except when public figures are being satirized, or when we post a real story. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental. Subcomandante Bob once got jiggy with your mom, and she does things in bed that would shock you, dude. The content of this website is the property of National Nitwit ® and its authors, and may not be reprinted or retransmitted in whole or in part without the expressed written consent of the publisher. National Nitwit® is not designed for readers under 18 years of age. FAIR USE NOTICE: This site contains copyrighted material the use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. We are making such material available in our efforts to advance understanding of environmental, political, human rights, economic, democracy, scientific, and social justice issues, sustainable development, environmental, community and worker health, democracy, public disclosure, corporate accountability, and social justice issues, mostly because hot college women are also interested in the same issues. Go figure. Anyways, we believe this constitutes a "fair use" of any such copyrighted material as provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107, the material on this site is distributed without fee or payment of any kind to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving the included information for research and educational purposes, except when you are using it to get laid. If you wish to use copyrighted material from this site for purposes of your own that go beyond 'fair use', you must obtain permission from the copyright owner.

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?