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4/13/2006

Cracked Skull Not Enough; Britney Chucks Baby Off Balcony


(Los Angeles, CA) Pop star Britney Spears and her husband, whose baby received a cracked skull from a fall on Monday, decided to "finish the deed" and toss the baby from a third-story window.

"Funny thing is that the little bastard didn't die from this fall, either," said Spears, pausing to hit a water bong. "We may have to resort to even more drastic measures."

Spears said that her 6-month-old son, Sean Preston, seemed to be "like, indestructible or something" in his ability to resist death.

"We started with arsenic in his bottle, but it only seemed to make him stronger," she said, placing a basket of sharp knives in the baby's crib. "Even ground glass in his strained peas didn't faze the little fucker."

One option left open, said Spears, is professional help.

"Kevin knows this guy who knows a girl who knows a hit man," she said. "We may have to bring in this assassin if we can't kill the little shit ourselves." berlusconi proof

# posted by Subcomandante Bob : 12:04 AM
Comments:
that wasn't funny at all.
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 8:43 PM
 
He he, your reaction was.

*wipes mirthful tear*
# posted by Blogger Chris : 2:01 AM
 
Made me laugh!
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 5:10 AM
 
Your people are SICK!
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 5:11 PM
 
Ahh, a mutha's tender love for her child.

Kinda gets you right here.

Sniff!
# posted by Blogger Hooda Thunkit (Dave Zawodny) : 5:41 PM
 
It's not funny simply because any mention of Britney Spears throws a wet blanket over even the funniest dead baby joke.
# posted by Blogger Charles N. Steele : 9:15 PM
 
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