.comment-link {margin-left:.6em;}

7/04/2006

Israel Offers Three First-Round Picks, Player TBA for Shalit

Left: Israel's IDF really wants this 6'4" point guard

(Tel Aviv) Israeli prime minister Ehud Olmert today ignored a deadline to begin releasing Palestinian prisoners, and instead offered a package of draft picks and a player to be named later for Gilad Shalit.

"We felt like speed is the way the game is going right now," said Olmert. "You see all those different teams playing multiple point guards at one time. I don't think you can have too many."

Shalit said that he believed he was a better fit with the IDF than with Hamas-affiliated militants.

"My style of play is up-tempo," said the 19-year-old, who was drafted out of Mitzpe Hila in the Western Galilee with the No. 13 pick of the 2004 draft. "We've got some good players over that I can help make a little better and get open shots for the rest of the guys."

Commander of the Israeli Southern Command, Aluf Yoav Galant, confirmed that Shalit remains in Gaza at the moment.

"Shalit has great speed and great decision making, and I think we need to have more of that," he said. "First of all the rebounding, the defense, the shot. You add those two assets together, and I think Shalit's a pretty darn good fit."

Comments:
They don't call the Commandante "politically correct" for nothing. In fact, they don't call him politically correct at all.

But this is the best commentary on this affair we are likely to see.
 
(bowing to the inimitable Charles N. Steele)
 
Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link



<< Home
Copyright 2007, National Nitwit ® . Unauthorized duplication prohibited, but feel free to link away. This is a satirical newspaper, and many of these stories are fictional. You have to guess which ones are faked. National Nitwit ® uses invented names in its stories, except when public figures are being satirized, or when we post a real story. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental. Subcomandante Bob once got jiggy with your mom, and she does things in bed that would shock you, dude. The content of this website is the property of National Nitwit ® and its authors, and may not be reprinted or retransmitted in whole or in part without the expressed written consent of the publisher. National Nitwit® is not designed for readers under 18 years of age. FAIR USE NOTICE: This site contains copyrighted material the use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. We are making such material available in our efforts to advance understanding of environmental, political, human rights, economic, democracy, scientific, and social justice issues, sustainable development, environmental, community and worker health, democracy, public disclosure, corporate accountability, and social justice issues, mostly because hot college women are also interested in the same issues. Go figure. Anyways, we believe this constitutes a "fair use" of any such copyrighted material as provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107, the material on this site is distributed without fee or payment of any kind to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving the included information for research and educational purposes, except when you are using it to get laid. If you wish to use copyrighted material from this site for purposes of your own that go beyond 'fair use', you must obtain permission from the copyright owner.

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?