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7/02/2006

Wife of Enzyte's "Bob" Now Has to Fake Eight Orgasms a Week

Enzyte wife
(Los Angeles, CA) Enzyte, the "natural" male enhancement pill being pitched on television, has at least one naysayer.

"Mary," the wife of Smiling Bob Enzyte, told National Nitwit reporters that her life has been "a living hell" since Bob started taking the supplement.

"He has that stupid grin on his face all day, and thinks he's a porn star now," she said, lighting a cigarette. "It was bad enough faking one orgasm a month, but now I'm faking them eight times a week."

"Mary" (not her real name) said that Bob's "idiotic smile" has caused the couple considerable grief.

Smiling Bob Enzyte Left: Smiling Bob


"We were at my mother's funeral last month, and he couldn't get that smirk off his face," she said. "Not to mention the perpetual woody in front of the casket. The man has lost his fucking mind."

Mary said that she is considering legal action against Enzyte for the changes in her husband.

"Sure, he was kind of a doofus before, but at least he was normal," she said. "Now I have to keep a bib on him to soak up the drool, and the kids won't even go near the blithering moron. Thanks a whole bunch, Enzyte."

# posted by Subcomandante Bob : 9:20 PM
Comments:
bob bob bob
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 10:06 PM
 
hahahhah great post!
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 12:51 AM
 
Only eight times a week?

Maybe "Mary" should advertise for an au pair for the summer, to share the load, so to speak ;-)

Of course the "woody in front of the casket of Mary's departed Mum" thing could be laid at Enzyte's feet, but it could also mean that Smilin Bob is (or, was) a closet necrophiliac...
# posted by Blogger Hooda Thunkit (Dave Zawodny) : 8:28 PM
 
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