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12/04/2006

Vegan Secretly Devours Cans of Vienna Sausage

Vegan who is a closet carnivoreErickson: Closet processed meat lover

(Toledo, OH) Brittany Erickson has been a vegan for "a couple of years," but admits that she occasionally binges on a most unusual food choice.

"I just can't stop eating those little Vienna sausages," she admitted in an interview with reporters. "If I see a can at a Mini-Mart, I am so screwed, because I will eat them until I puke."

Erickson said that she feels "really dirty" after scarfing containers of the canned links, and she considers this urge to be a form of compulsive behavior.

"I have to go in the shower and scrub myself - hard. Then I gargle with mouthwash to get the taste out," she acknowledged. "Still, I really crave something about those musky, salty sausages, and I need help."

Vienna sausages Left: Deceptively addictive, and safe for up to ten years

Her secret obsession remains hidden from her vegan friends, Erickson said.

"It's not like they would disown me or anything, but this isn't exactly something I want to broadcast, you know?" she asked. "We were at a PETA march last week, and I had to sneak off and buy a couple of cans of that stuff. God, I am sick."

# posted by Subcomandante Bob : 7:07 PM
Comments:
heh heh - SAUSAGE.
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 7:34 PM
 
Ik Ik Ik.. it's a horrible addiction..I'm attending SA meetings now and with the help of God and my fellow addicts I hope I can beat this sausage thing!
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 9:37 AM
 
Addicted to teenet weeney sausages...

Now, that's a hoot!

It's obviously closely related to the dreaded vegan's disease ;-)
# posted by Blogger Hooda Thunkit (Dave Zawodny) : 3:34 PM
 
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