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Vile Foot Odor Lingers Hours After Guest Leaves

Grossed out student Left: Mitchell is "disgusted on many levels"

(Ann Arbor, MI) University of Michigan law student Curtis Mitchell says that he keeps a clean dorm, but is not quite a "neat freak."

"I just like to keep my belongings orderly and my space looking decent, nothing too special," he told National Nitwit reporters early this morning. "But what Josh did to my room might never be fixed."

Mitchell said that dorm acquaintance Josh Kirkwood stopped by a few hours ago, and left behind an unwanted gift.

"He came in here, kicked off his nasty Jordans, and the foot funk hit me straight away," said Mitchell, shuddering at the olfactorial recollection of rancid feet. "I was all like: 'Yo - get that shit right out of here,' but the damage was already done."

Dirty foot Left: The source of the persistent stench appears to have emanated from Kirkwood's feet

Mitchell said that "stank particles" seem to have fastened themselves to his carpet, resisting his efforts to eradicate the foul smell.

"I've tried everything: baking soda, Carpet Fresh, Lysol - my room has been permanently fouled," he said, looking down at the odoriferous floor covering. "It's like the dude hadn't washed his feet or socks in six months. I mean - that kind of shit is just wrong, you know?"

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You gotta feel for the dude, though. No one has the right to leave behind "stank particles." Ugh.
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