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Gravestone of Late "Eighth Rolling Stone" Vandalized

(London) Unknown vandals defaced the grave marker of sometime Rolling Stones member Trevor Whittaker today, spraypainting derisive comments toward the late musician.

Friends and acquaintances of the so-called "Eighth Rolling Stone" said that they were shocked at the vandalism, which read: "WANKER! NOT A ROLLING STONE."

"Trev got the shit end of the stick all his life, and now this," muttered Stones drummer Charlie Watts. "I can't imagine someone thinking this was funny. Trev was a gentle soul, a kind man who always tried to improve himself and those around him. Plus, he was never without a good source for dope. You need that in a friend, you know - you have to surround yourself with people who can score a half-ounce at a moment's notice, and Trevor Whittaker was that man."

A multi-instrumentalist, Whittaker sometimes filled in for Stones members on tour, and performed on a number of the band's recordings. Former bassist Bill Wyman said that Whittaker had other important duties.

"He never failed to help me find the youngest groupies," Wyman recalled. "There'd be some 15-year-old budgie swinging around, and he'd always send her to me, never bagging her for himself. Regular standup guy, that Trevor. Shame about his grave and all."

Whittaker: Disrepected even after death

Guitarist Keith Richards said that Whittaker went "above and beyond" the call of duty in his day-to-day dealings with the band, even for an unofficial Stone.

"One night the cops raided my flat, and they found a couple of grams of smack. I thought I was completely fucked," he admitted. "Trev steps up, tells the copper it was his, and took the rap for me. That's a true friend, although I felt bad about the whole prison bitch thing he had to go through. Some blokes just never seem to get a break. That was Trev."

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