.comment-link {margin-left:.6em;}


ABC Launches "America's Funniest Colostomy Bag Rupture Videos"

(Los Angeles) Capitalizing on its successful America's Funniest Home Videos franchise, ABC announced today that the network will premier a new viewer-submitted video program focusing on the lighter side of colostomy bags.

To help boost ratings, ABC will be bringing back longtime Home Video host Bob Saget, who briefly spoke with National Nitwit reporters on the show's set.

"Look - a colostomy patient is a walking bag of humor - heh heh - and every colostomate we have met thinks this show will be a winner," he said in between voiceovers. "Like this lady Theresa we got a video from. She has this absolutely hilarious video of her 74th birthday where her dimwitted husband accidentally punctures her colostomy bag with the knife he was going to use to cut her cake, and the shit winds up EVERYWHERE! Just priceless!"

Saget said that he was surprised that so many colostomy patients would be willing to share videos of what many people consider to be an embarassing situation.

"These folks have a lot of intestinal fortitude," he chuckled. "These parents sent one in of their two-year-old, who is having difficulty adjusting to wearing the bag. Little Jacob is on the playground, coming off the slide, and there's this brown streak behind him. Best part is where all the normal kids run away screaming, like he's a monster or something with all that liquid waste dribbling down the front of the kid. Oh man - I laughed for a week!"

Labels: , , ,

Why would somebody even film that? ABC is nasty!
Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home
Copyright 2007, National Nitwit ® . Unauthorized duplication prohibited, but feel free to link away. This is a satirical newspaper, and many of these stories are fictional. You have to guess which ones are faked. National Nitwit ® uses invented names in its stories, except when public figures are being satirized, or when we post a real story. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental. Subcomandante Bob once got jiggy with your mom, and she does things in bed that would shock you, dude. The content of this website is the property of National Nitwit ® and its authors, and may not be reprinted or retransmitted in whole or in part without the expressed written consent of the publisher. National Nitwit® is not designed for readers under 18 years of age. FAIR USE NOTICE: This site contains copyrighted material the use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. We are making such material available in our efforts to advance understanding of environmental, political, human rights, economic, democracy, scientific, and social justice issues, sustainable development, environmental, community and worker health, democracy, public disclosure, corporate accountability, and social justice issues, mostly because hot college women are also interested in the same issues. Go figure. Anyways, we believe this constitutes a "fair use" of any such copyrighted material as provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107, the material on this site is distributed without fee or payment of any kind to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving the included information for research and educational purposes, except when you are using it to get laid. If you wish to use copyrighted material from this site for purposes of your own that go beyond 'fair use', you must obtain permission from the copyright owner.

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?