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Navy Stages Production of Musical "Wicked" Off Iran Coast

(Washington, DC) The U.S. Navy staged its latest musical production off the Iranian coastline on Wednesday, sending two aircraft carriers and landing ships packed with 17,000 U.S. Marines and sailors to carry out unannounced theatrics in the Persian Gulf.

Navy officials said Iran was not notified of plans to sail nine ships, including two aircraft carriers, through the Straits of Hormuz, a narrow channel in international waters off Iran's coast and a major artery for global oil shipments.

"There's always the threat of any state or non state actor that might decide to close a theatrical production in one of the international straits, and the biggest one is the Straits of Hormuz," said Rear Admiral Kevin Quinn, who is leading the troupe. "What is so special about this is that you have two equally talented casts. Everybody will see us because it is in daylight, and you can bet your sweet asses that this will be one ship-shape production, sailor."

Based on Gregory Maguire’s best-selling novel, the musical Wicked tells the story of a friendship between two girls: the blond and popular Glinda and the misunderstood green girl, Elphaba, whose destiny is to become the Wicked Witch of the West. Admiral Quinn said he hoped Iran did not get the wrong idea about America's intentions.

"I hope they don't get a message -- a wrong message -- and we certainly don't want any miscalculation on anybody's part on what we are doing," Quinn said. "The Navy's production of Wicked is only meant to set new records for long-running musicals in the region, and to keep the Persian Gulf open for the free flow of theater tickets at fair prices. Besides, we're really just trying to defend the rights of anybody, whether they're gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, or a sailor, to have the option to see a quality Broadway production."

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It's the old baffle/dazzle them with show tunes ploy;positively diabolical ;-)
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