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7/02/2007

Face of Argentine Politics, or the New Face of Hotness?

A National Nitwit Exclusive
By Billy Pilgrim, Rogue Editor and Pussy Connoisseur

Fernández de Kirchner: Let Me Stand Next to Your Centrist-Progressive Fire

(Buenos Aires)—After decades of bloated, stale male physiques dominating the global political landscape, it appears that ranking Argentine senator and presidential hopeful Cristina Fernández de Kirchner may prove a stunning alternative to the sad state of bureaucratic repulsiveness.

And at 54, Fernández de Kirchner is by all accounts a shrewd politician with experience as a lawyer and elected official in both houses of the Argentine congress, but more importantly, she is a straight-up fox.

“Do you know how long it’s been since a young boy in Latin American could masturbate to the cover of a newspaper?” snorted Associated Press political analyst Jacob Westhouse. “I’ll tell ya — a fucking long-ass time. Not since Eva Peron, and that bitch has been dead for like, three hundred years.”

Other experts corroborated Westhouse’s exuberant pronouncement of Fernández de Kirchner's bodacious assets.

“If Fernández de Kirchner wins in October, she’ll be the first hot president of anything, ever, especially since [French presidential candidate] Ségolène Royal lost by a gazillion votes,” intoned Roland McVie, a senior analyst with BBC International. “I mean, there have been a few hot first ladies —Abigail Adams had tits the size of cantaloupes, and Grace Coolidge had the best dick-sucking lips I’ve ever seen — but by and large, this would be a remarkable victory for beauty. With a face like hers, who gives a shit about foreign policy?”

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# posted by Subcomandante Bob : 12:44 PM
Comments:
Christina IS hot!

A little spice, although naughty, can be nice ;-)
# posted by Blogger Hooda Thunkit (Dave Zawodny) : 2:21 PM
 
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