.comment-link {margin-left:.6em;}

10/25/2005

Gary Coleman To Replace Stern


(New York) Child television star Gary Coleman, who achieved short-lived fame in the 1980s television sitcom "Diff'rent Strokes," has been chosen to fill the radio spot held by Howard Stern.

Coleman was a much-hyped mystery guest on Stern's nationwide radio show on Tuesday (October 25), where the actor revealed his will be the voice greeting Stern regulars the morning of January 3 — at least in several of the markets comprising the self-proclaimed King of All Media's syndicated, 27-station kingdom, an empire Stern has spent decades building.

"I am really looking forward to taking over for Howard," said the diminuitive Coleman. "The first thing I am going to do is get that cracker bastard Mr. Drummond on the air and bitch-slap that old pervert."

The choice for a Stern replacement was easy after interviewing Coleman, said Joel Hollander, Infinity's chairman and CEO.

"When we set out to find a replacement for Howard Stern, we took the opportunity to cultivate a wide array of talent, from both in and out of the radio industry," he said. "Coleman was by far the best, and the little fucker can still crack that shit-eating grin."

Coleman said that his deal - worth a reputed $500K a year - will go a long way toward paying bills.

"I stupidly tried to help that crackhead Todd Bridges out when he went nuts, and wound up about a million in the red," he said. "I am going to take that money and buy me a nice house in the suburbs. No more of that crazy city shit for me."

Comments:
"...Gary Coleman...who achieved short-lived fame..."

Duh, Obvious...

Not to mention cold...

;-)
 
ha ha ha ha
 
Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link



<< Home
Copyright 2007, National Nitwit ® . Unauthorized duplication prohibited, but feel free to link away. This is a satirical newspaper, and many of these stories are fictional. You have to guess which ones are faked. National Nitwit ® uses invented names in its stories, except when public figures are being satirized, or when we post a real story. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental. Subcomandante Bob once got jiggy with your mom, and she does things in bed that would shock you, dude. The content of this website is the property of National Nitwit ® and its authors, and may not be reprinted or retransmitted in whole or in part without the expressed written consent of the publisher. National Nitwit® is not designed for readers under 18 years of age. FAIR USE NOTICE: This site contains copyrighted material the use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. We are making such material available in our efforts to advance understanding of environmental, political, human rights, economic, democracy, scientific, and social justice issues, sustainable development, environmental, community and worker health, democracy, public disclosure, corporate accountability, and social justice issues, mostly because hot college women are also interested in the same issues. Go figure. Anyways, we believe this constitutes a "fair use" of any such copyrighted material as provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107, the material on this site is distributed without fee or payment of any kind to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving the included information for research and educational purposes, except when you are using it to get laid. If you wish to use copyrighted material from this site for purposes of your own that go beyond 'fair use', you must obtain permission from the copyright owner.

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?