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6/09/2006

Fed's Bernanke Admits He Purposely Screws With Analysts

Left: Try to guess what these two fingers mean

(Washington, DC) US Federal Reserve chairman Ben Bernanke told National Nitwit reporters today that he often speaks and acts in cryptic ways "just to jerk around the analysts."

"Hey, this job is kind of dull otherwise," he said. "Is there anything wrong with, say, using my finger to tap "S-O-S" in Morse code while I deliver a speech? The look on the faces of the investment wonks is priceless."

Bernanke said that the inclusion of a previously-unused word in a speech "drives reporters crazy."

"I dropped the word mediastinum in a speech the other day, and the bastards were falling all over themselves," he chuckled. "Nobody wanted to admit that they had never heard of the word, but they were panicking because they didn't know if I was signalling another jump in inflation. Too much!"

One of Bernanke's favorite tricks involves word play.

"Just for fun we will sometimes string a bunch of words together to create an acronym, like when we put a press release out with the words Real Asset Tax Extension; Health Industry Keeps Expanding last week," he said. "It only took 45 minutes for some dipshit to hit the wire with a prediction of a Fed rate hike. Hilarious!"

Comments:
dumb ass
 
nice work bob. Seeing the bernake on tv made me realize what a false fronter he is. TV really shows the truth. I noticed this am that Bush Jr must be using the Brit PM's drama coach. Everyone likes that sort of regular guy-speak; up till now george has been completely unconvincing.
 
I'm sorry...I have to admire this guy's gall. I guess it just goes to show you should never put a smart ass in a position of power.
 
BOYS HALF A PENIS GIRLS HALF A BAGINA
 
Ann Coulter World Cup Al Gore Armando Zarqawi
 
Wow. You are so observant, anonymous.
 
So......what does his dick up bush's ass mean?
 
I think it just highlights how unreasonable it is to have a monetary system based on the whim of a handful of unelected men. It essentially means that beyond the obvious reactions of the Fed, speculative activity becomes like 20 questions or a game of charades. All Fed chairman have been laughing at us behind our backs, the B man is just the 1st to preside over an America dulled down enough that he can say it.
 
Bernanke hasn't yet been told that it's not nice to toy with the lower life forms like that.

Hah!

:-)
 
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