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10/04/2006

Bush Administration Torn Between "Operation Clusterfuck" and "Desert Quagmire" as New Iraq War Names

Left: One of tomorrow's terrorists plotting new attacks and disrupting Operation Iraqi Freedom

(Washington, DC) Noting that Iraq is in "great danger" of descending into full-scale civil war, Bush administration officials gathered to discuss possible replacement codenames for the US military activities in the troubled nation.

"Face it - even our own generals are pessimistic about the chances for peace," said White House spokesman Tony Snow to the gathered advisers. "I suggest something like 'Operation Shit Pants' or 'Mission: FUBAR' to more accurately describe the situation on the ground over there."

Deputy Secretary of Defense Gordon England disagreed, arguing that the new name should convey a "sense of purpose."

"I am more partial to 'Operation Clusterfuck,' because we owe the men and women serving America a name that shifts blame upwards, but not too high up," he said. "I also kind of like 'Situation Asshattery,' but I am not sure that one translates very well into Arabic."

Left: The desire for a new war name brought top minds to the table

Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff Gen. Peter Pace indicated that he preferred a "throwback" codename.

"Something with the word 'desert' in it, like 'Desert Quagmire' or 'Desert Shit-Hole' would be pretty good," he said. "But we need something different, because the only Iraqis with 'freedom' got right the fuck out before everything went to hell."

Comments:
A couple of my favorites:

Operation Chinese Fire Drill
(sucessor to operation clusterfuck)

-and-

Operation Blame Bush or Blame Rummy

Other, more "catchy" names might be deemed offensive by the peacenicks though ;-)
 
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