10/04/2006
Bush Administration Torn Between "Operation Clusterfuck" and "Desert Quagmire" as New Iraq War Names
Left: One of tomorrow's terrorists plotting new attacks and disrupting Operation Iraqi Freedom
(Washington, DC) Noting that Iraq is in "great danger" of descending into full-scale civil war, Bush administration officials gathered to discuss possible replacement codenames for the US military activities in the troubled nation.
"Face it - even our own generals are pessimistic about the chances for peace," said White House spokesman Tony Snow to the gathered advisers. "I suggest something like 'Operation Shit Pants' or 'Mission: FUBAR' to more accurately describe the situation on the ground over there."
Deputy Secretary of Defense Gordon England disagreed, arguing that the new name should convey a "sense of purpose."
"I am more partial to 'Operation Clusterfuck,' because we owe the men and women serving America a name that shifts blame upwards, but not too high up," he said. "I also kind of like 'Situation Asshattery,' but I am not sure that one translates very well into Arabic."
Left: The desire for a new war name brought top minds to the table
Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff Gen. Peter Pace indicated that he preferred a "throwback" codename.
"Something with the word 'desert' in it, like 'Desert Quagmire' or 'Desert Shit-Hole' would be pretty good," he said. "But we need something different, because the only Iraqis with 'freedom' got right the fuck out before everything went to hell."
(Washington, DC) Noting that Iraq is in "great danger" of descending into full-scale civil war, Bush administration officials gathered to discuss possible replacement codenames for the US military activities in the troubled nation.
"Face it - even our own generals are pessimistic about the chances for peace," said White House spokesman Tony Snow to the gathered advisers. "I suggest something like 'Operation Shit Pants' or 'Mission: FUBAR' to more accurately describe the situation on the ground over there."
Deputy Secretary of Defense Gordon England disagreed, arguing that the new name should convey a "sense of purpose."
"I am more partial to 'Operation Clusterfuck,' because we owe the men and women serving America a name that shifts blame upwards, but not too high up," he said. "I also kind of like 'Situation Asshattery,' but I am not sure that one translates very well into Arabic."
Left: The desire for a new war name brought top minds to the table
Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff Gen. Peter Pace indicated that he preferred a "throwback" codename.
"Something with the word 'desert' in it, like 'Desert Quagmire' or 'Desert Shit-Hole' would be pretty good," he said. "But we need something different, because the only Iraqis with 'freedom' got right the fuck out before everything went to hell."
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A couple of my favorites:
Operation Chinese Fire Drill
(sucessor to operation clusterfuck)
-and-
Operation Blame Bush or Blame Rummy
Other, more "catchy" names might be deemed offensive by the peacenicks though ;-)
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Operation Chinese Fire Drill
(sucessor to operation clusterfuck)
-and-
Operation Blame Bush or Blame Rummy
Other, more "catchy" names might be deemed offensive by the peacenicks though ;-)
<< Home